Wednesday, 15 January 2025

10 Conversation Starters That Guarantee a Spark on Any Date

 

When it comes to dating, nothing builds a connection faster than great conversation. A thoughtful question or a lighthearted topic can turn an ordinary evening into a memorable experience. But starting those conversations can sometimes feel daunting—what if you say the wrong thing, or worse, run out of things to say? Don’t worry! Here are ten conversation starters that will guarantee a spark on any date, along with practical tips to keep the dialogue flowing naturally.




Why Conversation Starters Matter

First impressions are important, but keeping the energy alive after the initial hello is what really makes a date enjoyable. A well-timed conversation starter can:

  • Break the ice and ease nervousness.
  • Show genuine interest in the other person.
  • Help you discover shared values, interests, and passions.

Great conversations aren’t just about talking; they’re about listening, engaging, and creating a comfortable environment where both people feel at ease. Let’s dive into the golden rules for conversations before getting to the 10 starters that will make your date unforgettable.


The Golden Rules for Starting a Great Conversation

Before you try any of these conversation starters, keep these tips in mind:

  1. Be Curious and Authentic: Show genuine interest in the other person. People can sense when you’re not being sincere, so make sure your questions reflect curiosity.
  2. Avoid Controversial Topics Too Early: Steer clear of divisive topics like politics or religion until you’ve established a stronger connection.
  3. Be Present and Engaged: Make eye contact, smile, and actively listen to their responses. Your body language says as much as your words.
  4. Balance the Conversation: Share your own thoughts and stories, but avoid dominating the discussion. Aim for a balanced back-and-forth.

10 Conversation Starters That Guarantee a Spark

Here are ten tried-and-true conversation starters, along with tips on how to use them effectively.

1. "What’s the most exciting thing you’ve done recently?"

This question opens the door to fun, positive stories and allows your date to share something they’re proud of or passionate about.

  • Pro Tip: Be ready to share your own recent adventure or accomplishment to keep the energy going.

2. "If you could travel anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would you go?"

Travel is a universal topic that sparks excitement and curiosity. Their answer can reveal their personality, whether they’re adventurous, laid-back, or culturally curious.

  • Pro Tip: Ask follow-up questions like, “What’s the best trip you’ve ever been on?” or “What’s one place you’d never visit again?”

3. "What’s a childhood memory that always makes you smile?"

This question adds a personal touch and often leads to heartfelt or funny stories. It’s a great way to get to know someone on a deeper level.

  • Pro Tip: Share a nostalgic memory of your own to create a mutual bond.

4. "Do you have any hidden talents or hobbies most people don’t know about?"

This question invites your date to showcase something unique about themselves. You might discover they’re an amateur magician, a fantastic cook, or a budding artist.

  • Pro Tip: Keep the mood light and playful. If they’re shy, offer to share your own quirky talent first.

5. "If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be and why?"

This question inspires creativity and shows intellectual curiosity. It also sets the stage for a fascinating discussion about history, culture, or personal values.

  • Pro Tip: Be prepared to share your own choice and explain why. This can reveal a lot about your personality.

6. "What’s your go-to comfort food or guilty pleasure snack?"

Food is a universally loved topic, and this lighthearted question can spark laughs and even lead to shared tastes or recipes.

  • Pro Tip: If you discover a mutual love for a certain dish, suggest trying it together on a future date.

7. "What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?"

This question often brings out meaningful and reflective answers. It’s a great way to learn about your date’s values and life perspective.

  • Pro Tip: Respect the tone of their response. If it’s heartfelt, respond with empathy and your own thoughtful advice.

8. "What’s something on your bucket list you’re really excited to try?"

Talking about bucket list items gets people dreaming and excited. Their answer might inspire ideas for future adventures.

  • Pro Tip: Show enthusiasm for their ambitions and share something from your own bucket list to keep the conversation engaging.

9. "If you won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you’d do?"

This playful question invites imagination and creativity. It can also give you a glimpse into their priorities and values.

  • Pro Tip: Encourage them to elaborate with questions like, “Would you keep working?” or “Who would you help first?”

10. "What’s one thing you’re passionate about that you could talk about for hours?"

This open-ended question allows your date to share something meaningful and personal. It’s a great way to discover what makes them tick.

  • Pro Tip: Be an active listener and ask thoughtful follow-up questions to keep the conversation flowing.


Pro Tips for Keeping the Conversation Flowing

Now that you’ve got the conversation started, here’s how to keep it going:

  1. Ask Follow-Up Questions: Show interest in their answers by diving deeper. For example, if they mention a love for hiking, ask about their favorite trail or most memorable hike.
  2. Share Your Own Stories: Keep the balance by adding your own experiences and insights. A conversation should feel like a tennis match, not a one-sided interview.
  3. Watch Their Body Language: If your date seems excited, keep exploring the topic. If they seem uncomfortable, switch to a lighter subject.
  4. Know When to Move On: If a topic feels stale, smoothly transition by saying, “That’s so interesting. It reminds me of…” and introduce a new idea.

A great date is built on meaningful and enjoyable conversations. These ten conversation starters are designed to spark connection, laughter, and a sense of comfort between you and your date. Whether it’s their dream travel destination, a cherished childhood memory, or their hidden talent, these topics will help you learn more about each other in a fun and engaging way.

Next time you’re preparing for a date, keep these conversation starters in your back pocket. Try them out and see how they transform your experience! Have a favorite conversation starter of your own? Share it in the comments below—we’d love to hear from you!

 

 

Tuesday, 14 January 2025

Unlocking Love: How Dating Aesthetics Can Transform Your Romantic Life

 

Hey there, love seekers! Have you ever heard of dating aesthetics? It’s more than just a buzzword—it’s a game changer in the world of romance. Aesthetics in dating refers to the visual and experiential elements that shape how we connect with potential partners. Picture this: the right vibe, the perfect outfit, and a setting that just screams romance. It’s these elements that can elevate a mundane meeting into a sparks-flying experience! These are the keys to success in relationship goals.

So, why should aesthetics matter to you? Because first impressions are potent; they set the tone for everything that follows. Let’s dive into how embracing dating aesthetics can take your romantic life to another level!


The Power of First Impressions

The Science Behind First Impressions

Did you know that it takes mere seconds to form an opinion about someone? Yup, studies suggest that within the first seven seconds, we often make judgments about a person’s attractiveness, confidence, and even their trustworthiness. This means that your aesthetic presentation can significantly impact someone’s initial feelings toward you.

Visual Appeal in Attraction

Think about it: You wouldn’t wear pajamas to a first date, right? Visual appeal is a crucial part of attraction, and it goes beyond what meets the eye. It encompasses your style, grooming, and the overall vibe you project.

Understanding Your Own Aesthetic

Finding Your Unique Style

Every one of us has a unique aesthetic, whether it’s minimalist, bohemian, or preppy. Take the time to explore what resonates with you. This doesn’t mean becoming someone you’re not; it’s about enhancing your best features (both inside and out) to attract the right person for you.

The Role of Personal Branding

Your dating aesthetic is part of your personal brand—you know, the “you” that speaks even before you say a word. It tells potential partners about your interests, lifestyle, and even your values.

The Importance of Setting

Choosing the Right Atmosphere

Ever been to a café that radiated positivity? The right setting can amplify your connection. Whether it’s a cozy coffee shop or a chic rooftop bar, the atmosphere plays a significant role in how you and your date feel.

The Impact of Locations on Mood

Let’s be honest, a quiet, dimly lit restaurant can spark deep conversations, while a loud nightclub might just lead to misunderstandings. Choosing the right place can set a rhythmic vibe that helps you feel comfortable and open which can also contribute to the romance aesthetic.

Creating a Personalized Dating Profile

Choosing the Right Photos

Your online dating profile is your digital calling card. Make sure to choose photos that reflect who you are. Invest time in picking a few good ones that show your personality and style!

Crafting Engaging Bios

When it comes to writing your bio, let your true self shine through. A well-crafted bio can act like a magnet, pulling in those who resonate with you while repelling mismatches.

The Role of Communication Style

Verbal and Non-Verbal Cues

Communication goes beyond just words. The way you sit, gesture, or even make eye contact sends signals to your date. So, be mindful of those non-verbal cues—they can enhance or hinder your connection!

Crafting Engaging Conversations

Keep conversations light and engaging. Ask open-ended questions and be genuinely interested in your date’s responses. This not only shows that you care but also creates a more personal and intimate atmosphere.

The Influence of Social Media on Dating Aesthetics

Curating Your Online Presence

In today’s digital age, your social media presence can either positively or negatively affects your dating life. Curating your profiles to reflect your values and aesthetics can attract like-minded individuals.

The Risks of Over-Sharing

Remember, keeping some mystery is key. Over-sharing can often backfire and make you seem less desirable. It's all about balance! But that does not mean you should resort to fake bf or gf pics!

Dressing for Success

Fashion Tips for Dates

Dressing well doesn’t mean wearing a tux or a ball gown. Choose outfits that make you feel confident and comfortable. You want your clothes to reflect your personality—after all, they’re an extension of you!

Clothing Colors and Their Impact on Perception

Did you know that colors evoke different emotions? Wearing red can convey passion, while blue often symbolizes trust. Consider what message you want to send when choosing your outfit for a date.

The Importance of Grooming

Personal Hygiene and Presentation

Grooming isn’t just about looking good; it’s about feeling good too! Regular grooming habits go a long way in making a lasting impression.

Grooming Tips for Different Occasions

Whether it’s a casual outing or a fancy dinner, adjust your grooming to fit the occasion. This shows thoughtfulness and respect for your date.

Creating Memorable Dates

Unique Date Ideas

Forget the boring dinner-and-a-movie routine. How about trying a pottery class or going hiking? Unique experiences can help break the ice and create lasting memories.

How to Enhance the Dating Experience with Aesthetic Elements

Think about the little details: bring along a picnic blanket, play some soft music, or even surprise your date with homemade treats. These thoughtful touches can really elevate any date.

The Role of Ambiance in Dating

Importance of Lighting and Sound

Lighting can make or break the mood. Opt for warm, dim lighting for intimacy, or choose bright, energizing spaces for fun. Sound matters too; whether it’s a busy café or a quiet park, pick a spot that supports your intended vibe.

How to Create a Romantic Atmosphere

Want to add a sprinkle of romance? Bring along a scented candle for an evening picnic or choose a venue with soft music—it's all about creating a sensory experience.

Utilizing Creative Gifts and Gestures

Thoughtful Gifts that Speak Volumes

A thoughtful gift can shake up the dating dynamic. Even a simple bouquet of wildflowers or a handwritten note shows you care and pay attention.

The Aesthetic of Gift Presentation

Presentation is key! Wrap your gifts beautifully; the effort showcases thoughtfulness and creativity—it’s all about those little details.

Navigating Rejection and Setbacks

Handling Disappointment with Grace

Ah, rejection—it’s part of dating. Instead of dwelling on it, use it as a learning experience. Embrace it gracefully; there’s always someone else out there for you.

Learning and Growing

Each date, whether successful or not, teaches you something. Take a moment to reflect and grow from each experience.

Building a Lasting Connection

Depth Beyond Aesthetics: Personality Matters

While aesthetics can attract, personality keeps a connection alive. Ensure you are showcasing your true self, both in appearance and in conversation.

The Balance Between Looks and Compatibility

Remember: It’s all about balance. A dazzling aesthetic will only take you so far; strive for a deeper connection that resonates well beyond appearances.

In the end, dating aesthetics is ultimately about self-expression and connection. When you embrace your style, curate your environment, and engage actively with others, you’ll find that dating becomes more enriching. So, go ahead! Unlock the aesthetics of love and watch your romantic life blossom like never before. At that point you will really have achieved your relationship goals!

 Check out this video for more details on how to make it all happen! 


Monday, 13 January 2025

How To Have a Healthy Relationship With Your Boyfriend.

 

How much time do you spend trying to be the kind of woman you think men want? What is the secret to having a healthy relationship with your boyfriend?

The first secret is being your authentic self, rather than striving to become the "perfect woman" you think he wants. Many women fall into the trap of spending countless hours trying to look sexy and attractive, believing this will strengthen their bond. 

However, true connection comes from honesty, vulnerability, and understanding—not perfection. Your boyfriend doesn’t want an idealized version of you; he values the real you. 

By focusing on mutual respect, open communication, and being comfortable in your own skin, you’ll create a foundation for a genuinely healthy and fulfilling relationship.

If He Doesn’t Work for Your Relationship, He Won’t Value It




Fact:

What men value most are those things they have to work hard to get.

Hand a man a college diploma, and he won’t value it as much as if he’d had to put in years of study and effort to earn it.

Hand a man the perfect girlfriend, and he won’t value her as much as if he’d had to woo her for weeks just to get her to go out with him. This is why playing hard to get works.

But, as you’ve probably already noticed…

There’s a BIG problem with playing hard to get. That strategy stops working once he’s actually got you.

Something happens when guys decide they’ve won you. It’s almost like they think, “Game over.” Their minds are already on their next challenge. What is going on?!

And how can you stop it from wrecking your relationship?

It’s Not Just You—ALL Women Experience This




Many women give up on love. They never let themselves get too close to a man, for fear of scaring him off. But other women try a different approach. They get help. Relationship coach James Bauer is one of the people they turn to.

He noticed that many clients were coming to him, complaining about guys who were blowing hot and cold. Everything would be going great, and then it was like…

Something would change overnight.

A guy who’d been warm, affectionate and interested would suddenly become distant. He’d no longer have any time for her. He wouldn’t smile in greeting. He’d stop making eye contact. His kisses were brusque. Wanting to help his clients, James investigated.

And what he discovered made sense of everything. He knew why these men were backing away. He knew what they needed … and what they weren’t getting.

It didn’t come down to anything wrong with these women.

Rather, it all came down to something he called “The Hero Instinct.”

Most Women Do Something that Drives Men Away…

Without Ever Realizing It

One of the most wonderful things about women is how naturally caring they are.

Look at you. You’re always there for your guy. You look after him. You always make time for him. You’d do anything for him.

You never realize that, in the process…

You’re actually taking something away from him. You’re taking away his purpose.

You see, he wants to be your hero. He doesn’t want you to be his hero.

Men love heroes. Look at how many grown men are still fascinated by Marvel comics and superhero movies.

Every man on Earth, from the time he was a boy, dreamed of growing up to be the kind of hero who would save the world—and get the girl at the same time.

Most men don’t get to indulge their world-saving side in their 9-5 jobs.

Circumstances don’t call for them to rip off their corporate ties and spring into action, revealing their superman side. Maybe they can’t save the world. But they can still get the girl.

Getting the girl is a worthy challenge for an ordinary guy with the heart of a superhero. It takes superhuman confidence. Superhuman charm. Superhuman immunity to pain. Now, all he needs to find is…

A girl who needs a hero. Do You Need a Hero? Let me guess… That’s not you.

You’re strong. You’re independent. You can fix a leaky faucet. You can drive a stick shift. You can take care of yourself. You’re never going to make that Jerry Maguire mistake of looking for a man to complete you.

Instead, you have a lot to offer a man. You’re generous. Kind. Loving. Giving to a fault. All you want is to find a man who’s willing to receive all you have to give.

And that’s why heroes aren’t showing up in your life. That’s why you’ve ended up with so many takers instead. Guys who take everything you have and leave you high and dry. If you want a hero, then you need to advertise for one. Here’s how.

3 Ways You Can Invite a Hero into Your Life, Starting Today

1. Ask a guy for help.

Ask him for advice on buying a new computer. Ask him to listen to that weird rattling sound that’s started up in your car. Ask him to reach something on the top shelf. Then thank him warmly, with a great big smile of appreciation. No, that doesn’t make you needy. It makes you a woman with space for a man in her life.

2. Take pleasure in male company.

Guys love women who appreciate men for just being men. So what if his apartment is a shrine to sports? So what if he spends hours on his fantasy football team? So what if his idea of a clean shirt is the one with the fewest wrinkles? He’s a guy. It’s okay. You don’t need him to be more like you, because you’ve got the feminine side of the gender equation covered.

3. Let him earn your respect.

Superheroes love challenges. They don’t want to be given a gold medal just for showing up. They don’t want your love handed to them on a plate. They want to earn it. There’s one thing they crave even more than a woman’s eternal enduring love: A challenge. So give him opportunities to prove himself. You don’t have to do the work of winning him over. Sit back, relax, and allow him the pleasure of winning your admiration.

Discover more about the "Attraction Triggers"

Keep Learning

If that sounds like fun to you, click here to watch a video presentation about this relationship enhancement tool. It’s something you can learn once, but then use for the rest of your life.

Wednesday, 30 December 2020

How To Make Him Want You

 Do you ever get a gut feeling about someone the instant you meet them?

When that happens, you know it’s not because of what they said or did. It’s some kind of signal you read in their facial expression, vocal tone, or body language.

Surprisingly, researchers have found that we are quite accurate with these instantaneous assessments about other people.

The simple fact is, you know things about a person the second you meet them. And you react to these unspoken signals automatically.

If you’re good at reading people, you may not find it surprising to learn that men and women notice different kinds of signals when interacting with a potential mate.

To skip ahead to the video that explains the unusual pattern of signals men look for in a romantic relationship, just follow this link.

It explains the hidden signal that either repels a man or makes him feel irresistibly attracted to you.

Otherwise, keep reading to learn about a particular signal you’re broadcasting to men all the time (whether you know it or not). It’s probably not what you would expect.

You see, there’s a specific kind of body language men simply can’t ignore. It’s a signal that can spark romantic feelings. Or it can repel him, depending on what he’s reading from your nonverbal cues.

Would you like to know what it is?

Men Are Extremely Sensitive to Something in Your Body Language That You Would Never Expect.

Women often ask me for the words to make a man want you. But the secret to make someone fall in love with you goes a bit deeper.

In fact, your ability to broadcast the right non-verbal message makes all the difference when it comes to attracting the kind of man you want. 

If you’ve been attracting attention from guys who fail to connect with you on a deep, emotional level, I may be able to show you why. 

You’re probably sending out just one very confusing signal...without even realizing it.

With the wrong signal, you end up with this:

  • Attention from the wrong kind of guys. The ones you aren’t interested in.
  • Initial attraction that later fades with the one guy you really wanted to attract.
  • A slow and painful death for the attraction and passion in your existing relationship.

But with a slight adjustment, you could be sending the right signal all the time. And you’d end up getting results more like this:

  • Passion that intensifies the longer you’re together
  • A guy who clearly feels protective of you
  • A deep feeling of private exclusivity as he lets you into his inner world
  • The difference can be dramatic. And it all comes down to this one signal I’m about to show you. 

In order to explain this signal, think of yourself as a radio tower.

You are constantly broadcasting a message to the men in your life. And there’s one “channel” he can’t tune out.

That’s because men have emotional “antennas” designed specifically to detect this one kind of signal.

Ready to find out which signal I’m talking about? Ok, here it is. 

He reads your nonverbal cues to find out where you “rank him” compared with other men.

He reads your body language to see how he measures up in your eyes. Does she respect me? Or am I just her play thing?

Does she look up to me in some ways? Does she value me compared to other men? Or is she just settling?

Why are men so sensitive to this one signal? 

Because, oddly enough, this signal tells him how you compare him to other men. So it influences how he feels about himself whenever he’s around you.

And it’s amazing how much this one signal affects his emotions. 

You see, in relationships, people don’t tell us what we really want to know. We have to listen to what’s written between the lines.

This kind of “listening” determines how we feel about each person we meet. And when it comes to romantic relationships, it tells us far more than spoken words.

Now tell me this. Which man would you rather commit to for life?

A man who compliments your beauty but seems to have difficulty keeping his eyes off other women? 

Or a man who is reserved with his compliments, but seems to have eyes only for you? 

The truth is, no one wants to end up with someone who is just settling. Instead, you want to feel desired. 

Men are no different. But what makes men feel desired is very different from what makes women feel desired. 

For example, research shows men often confuse love and respect. A man does not want to be loved by a romantic partner unless she also holds him in high regard compared with other men. 

Otherwise, it just feels like motherly love. That’s not what he wants. It’s not how he wants to perceive himself in his primary relationship. 

And that’s why...

Women often send mixed signals to the guy they’re interested in without even knowing it. 

It happens accidentally. And I have to tell you, it’s not your fault. 

Society has changed too fast for men and women to adapt to the rapid changes. We are left scrambling.

In nearly every culture there used to be a clear set of expectations. Those expectations guided men and women through the process of connecting with a lifelong partner.

Demonstrations of mutual admiration were built into the process of courtship. 

But those clear expectations are a thing of the past. These days, each couple has to invent their own path, dancing around unspoken expectations and feelings of uncertainty. 

And there’s something that often gets lost in our modern version of courtship. 

I’m talking about the ancient art of communicating desire through the language of admiration. It’s where the phrase, “You have an admirer” came from.

He doesn’t want you to settle.

He wants to feel like you see him as the ultimate catch. 

Otherwise, it deflates his ego. And with it, his passion for the relationship deflates too. 

He just can’t picture himself with a woman who looks up to other men more than she looks up to him. 

But this is where things get confusing.

Many women want to make their man feel loved. 

But a woman’s idea of loving communication is very different than a man’s. 

How do you communicate your true feelings to a man? And why are men so sensitive to tiny signals about where you rank him compared with other men? 

To dive a little deeper into that particular question, I put together a video presentation on the topic. 

It explains the most powerful signals you can use to grab a man’s attention. 

After watching this video, many women are surprised to learn how much control they have over a man’s self-esteem. 

And even more surprised by how easy it is to make someone cherish you and want to invest in the relationship. 

Many of us have a tendency to buy gifts of the sort we would like to receive ourselves. It can be like that with love. We try to love our partner the way we want to be loved. 

So you make him feel special. Yet he seems unaffected by that. You speak your own native love language to him. Apparently, he speaks another. 

But I’m here to tell you about one incredible, universal method you can use to grab his attention by showing that you get what he craves most. 

Click here now to discover an unfair advantage with men. Help him to finally see you as the one.


References:

Harry's Masculinity Report 201.  Men are happiest when a part of something where they feel needed and valued. 

Anderson, Cameron & Hildreth, John & Howland, Laura. (2015). Is the Desire for Status a Fundamental Human Motive? A Review of the Empirical Literature. Psychological bulletin. 141. 10.1037/a0038781. - Male need for respect. 

Gender Differences in Implicit Self-Esteem Following a Romantic Partner's Success or Failure," Kate A. Ratliff, PhD, University of Florida, and Shigehiro Oishi, PhD, University of Virginia; Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, online Aug. 5, 2013. - Men have lower self-esteem when their partner succeeds and they fail (i.e. they don't feel needed/irreplaceable). 

Canevello A, Crocker J. Creating good relationships: Responsiveness, relationship quality, and interpersonal goals. J Pers Soc Psychol. 2010;99(1):78-106. doi:10.1037/a0018186 - Showing him you believe in him and he's the one for the job. 

Reis HT, Lemay Jr EP, Finkenauer C. Toward understanding understanding: The importance of feeling understood in relationships. Social and Personality Psychology Compass. 2017:11(3):e12308. doi:10.1111/spc3.12308 - You value his point of view and abilities.

Wednesday, 9 December 2020

Why Men Pull Away

And how you can tap into his deep desire for commitment...

Maggie was confused. Rick had blown her away on their first two dates. No guy had ever worked so hard to impress her.

And impressed she was. He was attentive, respectful, gentle and engaged.

But then, just when she decided she'd fallen for him...poof. He withdrew.

Now their roles had reversed. Overnight, she was working to get his attention.

Why do men do that? Why do men shut women out?

Certainly, not every man pulls away when things start to heat up, but a lot of guys do.

Enough, in fact, that this is a common question among the women I work with as a dating and relationship coach.

Guys come on strong, pursuing with enough passion to make Romeo jealous, but when they win the attention of their Juliet, it's game over.

What gives?

Look, dating's a tough gig. Yes, it's fun and exciting, but it's also nerve-racking.

At first, it's all about the chase. He's trying to get your attention, and you're deciding whether or not he's worth it.

That's the time in any dating relationship when both people are so wrapped up in the pursuit that they're hardly giving any thought to what will come next.

And then, the pursuit changes.

You decide you're into the guy, and he, having won your attention, has to begin the process of considering an actual, serious relationship. Does he want one?

More than likely he does, or he wouldn't have been chasing you!

But, wanting it and being fearless enough to really go after it are two different things.

So, what's a girl to do?

Well, first I'll tell you what you should NOT do.

Avoid These Two Common Mistakes

First, don't assume it's about you. It almost certainly isn't. He was into you before you decided you were into him. He's still into you, now.

Second, don't pressure him. This is where a lot of the advice columns get it wrong. They often say you should play "hard to get" or some version of it.

Instead, let him know you're interested in him.

Do it in ways that don't smother or push. (Text messages every hour, on the hour, for example, might be over-doing it.)

Why do men pull away and shut women out at this phase of a relationship? Because he's a little nervous. He's nervous about giving up the freedom of choice.

Don't change, be the woman he fell in love with

During the pursuit phase, it's desire that motivates him. As soon as he realizes this could be something real, his motivation shifts.

Suddenly he's thinking about the many options he will give up, and the lifestyle changes he's committing to.

(A lot of guys have an irrational fear that all their activities will all become feminized if they commit to a woman.)

When he's acting this way, you don't have to change what you're doing. When he acts distant, your best bet is to appear calm and comfortable.



Be the woman he fell in love with (carefree, confident, and available).

Don't freak out—that'll freak him out. Don't demand his attention—that'll send him running. And don't launch into a panic that he's seen some fatal flaw in you.

Because that thought process will put you in a negative frame of mind, and that's anything but attractive.

Always Assume The Best

He pursued you for the first few dates, hoping you'd decide you were into him. He's gone out on a limb before.

Now it's your turn. Give him enough space to feel comfortable while still letting him know you're interested.

Any guy who truly wants a mature, real relationship will come around as soon as he sees there's nothing there to be afraid of.

And any guy who's not ready for a real relationship wasn't the catch you thought he was, anyway!

Now, before you settle into "waiting mode," I'd like to share a shortcut that can pull him back and rekindle his passionate pursuit at lightning speed.

There's nothing wrong with being patient, but if you want to pour a little miracle grow on your relationship, here's what I recommend you do next...

When He Shuts You Out, Try This...

Survey research shows men would rather be respected than loved. It's wired into our DNA.

We feel an irrational need to earn your respect as an avenue to becoming worthy of your love.

Now look, as a male dating coach working primarily with women, I know how crazy this must sound to you. But it's true.

It's one of the few "secrets" that really can give you an unfair advantage with men.

Here's how this knowledge can help.

If you channel a man's deep desire to earn your respect in the right ways, he will bend over backward for you.

And the more he does this, the easier it becomes for him to see himself in a long-term committed relationship with you.

And his favorite way to earn your respect?

He wants to be heroic. He wants to solve problems for you, come to your aid, and prove himself useful.

It's not very romantic, but it's woven into the fabric of his DNA.

And that's why I've put together a video explaining this phenomenon further so you can tap into his hero instinct anytime you want, even if he's currently asking for space.

Click here now to make this method yours before you forget and miss this opportunity to transform your luck with men.







Sunday, 6 December 2020

How do I Make Him Fall Back in Love with Me?

Relationships often go in cycles. Sometimes things are up and it all seems like smooth sailing. At other times, you drift apart and the waters are choppy and sharks seem to be circling. Sometimes you break up. Other times your relationship simply limps along. That loving feeling you used to have together feels like it's gone for good. But, what if you could get it back? What steps do you need to take to make him fall back in love with YOU?

Treat Yourself Like the Lady You Are

Sometimes you forget to treat yourself like a lady. You forget that you need a little pampering. You need to feed your soul. More importantly, you need to take care of yourself -- physically. You need to eat right, exercise, take care of your skin, get a new hair cut, etc. You need to feel good about the reflection you see in the mirror. You need to do all the things a lady does to feel like someone who deserves to have doors opened for her as well as other acts of chivalry. Once you start treating yourself like a lady, chances are he's going to notice and start treating you like a lady too.




Remember that this is about making you happy. Make changes that matter to you -- that will help you feel better about yourself and more confident. Some of the changes you might consider include:

•    Diet/Weight loss
•    Fitness
•    Makeover
•    Wardrobe update
•    Spa treatment
•    New hairstyle
•    Manicure
•    Pedicure
•    Teeth whitening

The changes do not have to be drastic in order to have a drastic impact on your self-confidence and outlook on the world around you. Nor, do they need to be major overhauls to get him to take notice. The main take away from this, however, is not that he won't love you if you're imperfect. It is that it is easier for him to fall back in love with you if you aren't busy tearing yourself down for perceived flaws instead.

Fall in Love with the Woman You Are
While it's always good to strive for improvement, it's also important that you love yourself for the woman you are. He will find it much easier to love you all over again if you love yourself as well. I'm not suggesting that you become a woman who is self-absorbed or self-obsessed. Only that you accept yourself for who you are and find peace with that. Embrace your strengths. Work to change your weaknesses, but don't punish yourself for being human. All of us are. Once you learn to love yourself, you'll be a much happier, person he's likely to find irresistible.

You don't have to move mountains or make miracles to win back his love. Love may ebb and flow over time but it takes a while to go away completely. The odds are in your favor that if he's loved you before, you can easily win back his love once you learn to love yourself too.

Thursday, 26 November 2020

Can Cheating Be Good for a Relationship?

More often than not, the kneejerk reaction to this question is "No way!" At least, that's the clean version of the reaction. However, there are times when cheating can be good for a marriage. This is the case, according to research conducted by Dr. Lucielle Ostertag from the Italian Institute of Social Sciences. Her study concluded that husbands and wives who cheat on each other are more likely to remain married. She further concluded, however, that long-term affairs, on the other hand, were detrimental to the marriage.

Obviously, the theory raised in this study has been met with a great deal of controversy. It goes against what we've been teaching in churches and communities over the last few hundred years. However, if you look back even further, the idea of one man for one woman is a relatively new concept. In the early years of humankind, it was all about survival of the species. In later years, as survival was far more assured, monogamy became the prevailing philosophy and has been adopted by many religions and cultures around the world ever since.

When Does Cheating Work?

According to Dr. Ostertag cheating works best when it's done far from home, is a short-lived fling, and when couples adopt a "don't ask; don't tell" philosophy about their cheating. Some couples even plan for cheating and establish ground rules so that it works for them.

How Can People Believe Cheating is Good?

Since the idea of cheating goes against the grain, it's hard for many people to understand why or how it could possibly be a good thing. The problem with many marriages is that you do marry your best friend. You love each other, but over time, the newness of it all, the sexual excitement, waivers. Turning to a short-term alternative, allows a little newness and excitement into the relationship without sacrificing the emotional bond or love the husband and wife have for one another.

There is another way cheating can help make marriages stronger. That way involves confirming that the grass is perfectly green within the marriage. Sometimes, the affair serves to affirm the loving relationship you have at home.

Is Cheating Good for all Relationships?
Absolutely not! There are all kinds of relationships where this would never work. Some people believe that there are certain vows that simple should not be broken. Forsaking all others is one of those vows. There's nothing wrong with being unable to forgive infidelity or unable to accept the idea that cheating could be good for marriage. Obviously, every marriage is different. What may be good for one is not necessarily good for others.

The take home from this should not be used to justify cheating. It's meant to show that it is possible to salvage your relationship, forgive, and move on even if your spouse has cheated on you. It is possible to forgive if that's what you want to do. You'll ultimately have to decide if you can make the most out of it in an effort to build a better relationship in the aftermath.